By Elsa K. Simcik

You’re sitting in a nail salon when all of a sudden the manicurist, who just happens to be Victoria Beckham, starts chasing you. You try to run but your feet are trapped in the pedicure spa. You try to scream but nothing comes out. And then you’re not in the nail salon at all anymore. You’re standing in the supermarket, in the frozen food aisle completely naked, buying fish fingers with David Hasselhoff.

Sound familiar? Okay, maybe that’s not exactly what happened to you in your latest dream, but we’ve all been there — the chasing, the screaming, the nudity. Some “dream experts” claim they’re all rife with meaning. So does my dream mean I have a fear of intimacy and I’m hiding a shameful secret? Or did I remember that I needed to schedule a nail appointment while I watched an old episode of Baywatch? Just like horoscopes, dreams may not have any real affect on your love life, but it’s fun to try to figure it out:

Nudist camp nightmares Maybe we’re all just a little bit sick, but the nudity theme is one of the most common dreams. It can mean several different things: 1.) you’re concealing something 2.) you feel caught off guard or 3.) you feel ashamed? If you just started a new relationship, you may feel hesitant about revealing your real feelings. Either that or you feel guilty that the abdominal toning machine you bought for Christmas is gathering dust in the corner…

Denture dreams
Even more common than the nudity scenario is the “teeth falling out” dream. It could mean that you’re concerned about your appearance and you just don’t feel attractive to the opposite sex. If you’re dating someone who doesn’t make you feel gorgeous, this may stir up some teeth shattering dreams. If you’re sure that you’re confident, go with the theory that launched the tooth fairy phenomenon: If you dream you’re losing your teeth, you’ll get money.

Bring your #2 pencil
Even if you’re long out of school, you may still have dreams about taking exams. There you are, staring at the paper, but you can’t see any of the questions. If you consistently have the test-taking dream, you may feel you’re being scrutinized or judged — maybe even by someone you’re interested in or dating. You also may feel like you can’t live up to a challenge. The good news is that if you have this type of dream, you’re usually the kind of person who does well on tests. It’s those of us who have the naked dreams that are failing.

Run, don’t walk
The chasing dream is another classic and it could simply mean you’re just plain scared of being chased by an attacker. Because of this, it is more common for women to have the chase dream than men. To get a little more metaphorical, it also may symbolize that you’re running away from a problem in your own life. In fact, the person chasing you may even represent yourself. You may be running from your own feelings of anger, jealousy or even love. So if I’m just chasing myself, no wonder I always wake up before I get caught.

Dream analysis is definitely not an exact science, and it’s probably not smart to make or break a relationship just because you dreamt your boyfriend was making out with all the women on The View. So whether you’re dreaming about giant elephants chasing you through your office or your teeth falling out and landing in your ex-boyfriend’s lap, the meaning of all of dreams inevitably leads to one thing — we’re all a bunch of stress heads who could really do with a good night’s sleep.