By Kate Maurer

Hollywood film Christmases: Sparkling snowflakes, happy families sharing a home-cooked meal, peace on Earth and good will toward men.

Your Christmases: Freezing rain, fighting relatives, dry turkey, frenzied shopping, nostalgia, uncertainty, and all you want to do is crawl under something and wait for it to be over.

If this sounds familiar, then you’ve got the Christmas holiday blues. If you’re going to beat them, you’ve got to get motivated. Here are five ways:

1. Christmas holidays don’t change everything; everything changes them.
If you’re grieving a loss, going through a break-up or out of work, the festive season is not going to erase those issues. It’s okay to feel upset or stressed at this time; often there are real reasons for it. Talk about those feelings with people you trust. Try acknowledging them as part of the celebration. Light a candle to acknowledge a departed loved one or to symbolise hopes for the future.

2. Write it down.
Keep your pen moving until you find the causes of your worries! Start with a list, maybe: “Things I hate about the Christmas holidays” or “Why I can’t stand visiting my family.” Feelings that you think you’re not supposed to have can bring on the blues, so if you’re making a list that seems just awful, you might be on the right track.

3. Get some sun.
Days in the northern hemisphere are pretty short right now. Depressing, isn’t it? So clear some time in the afternoon, bundle up, and don’t waste a sunny day. Exercise helps to reduce stress and improve mood, so a brisk walk in the sun is an all-around good idea.

4. Make Christmas your own.
Keep your celebration living and growing by creating a tradition to bring greater meaning to your holiday. Dream something up or try researching traditions from the past or other cultures. If you’re feeling detached from your religious beliefs, get to a local house of worship and reconnect.

5. Count your blessings.
Whether you feel like it or not. Write them down. Write notes to the important people in your life. Give time to a local charity. Think about the promise of the New Year and what you will do with it.

A new approach and a little effort will hopefully free you to celebrate with joy in your heart this year. If you are looking for love try a quick search online and set up a few dates.