By Debbie Magids, Ph.D.

Falling in love is easy – it’s a wonderful time when all you want to do is be with your partner, and all you do is think about ways to make him/her happy. But as we all know, after the “honeymoon,” so to speak, many couples find themselves trying to get that feeling again.

Don’t fret! You can revive romance by making your partner feel extra special, and hopefully your partner will do the same for you in return. Here are five simple ideas to ignite that old flame.

1. Make a date: Remember how exciting dating was? You were getting to know your mate – he/she was a mystery. Every new thing you learned was just one more reason that person was The One for you! Each time you revealed something, it was as if your wish was your mate’s command. You loved chocolates. Next date, he had a box in hand. He loved baseball, next date you were in the stands. Make your partner feel special by planning a night out on the town, doing whatever it is you know he/she enjoys.
2. Plan getaways: A weekend away from routine and friends and kids, if you have them, can replenish your relationship and remind you of why you are together – but you can’t escape just once to have this strategy work most effectively. Plan as many mini vacations as time, money, and other priorities will allow.
3. Pretend you just met: Sometimes couples get too comfortable with each other – they share every complaint, every bad mood. While this provides comfort, it takes a little something away from the romance. Try holding back some of the nitty gritty, day-to-day stuff. Instead, place your energies into romance – plan surprise dinners, dress sexy (versus the sweats you have grown accustomed to), and take a moment to share something intimate with your partner that you have never shared before, as if you were getting to know each other for the first time.
4. Take an interest in your partner’s interests: Feeling adored ignites sparks. Go to the opera with your mate. Play tennis, if that’s his/her game. Make an effort to enjoy what your partner enjoys. But don’t infringe on “private” activities – if he likes to golf with his buddies or she likes to go to the movies with the girls, find another interest to share. You may not love the activity, but you’ll love the company.
5. Be spontaneous: Break your routine, and explore new things together, things neither of you have done before. You will have another shared memory and stories to tell together.

Remember, the primary reason romance dies in any relationship is not paying enough attention to your partner’s needs. So, making your partner feel special will help you both get that feeling again!

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Visit Debbie Magids, Ph.D. at www.drdebbiemagids.com.