By Cindy Pearlman

Q: So how’s your dating life, Uma?
Terrifying! I don’t know about dating because my motto is: Any relationship is better than dating.

Q: Why is dating so tough these days?
Honestly, I don’t know how anybody dates today. It seems like the entire culture has changed. People don’t want to meet people in a bar. I also think that anybody you meet in a bar should stay in a bar.

Q: So, how should people meet?
Honestly, it’s so hard for people to make contact these days—especially if you’re a mature grownup who cares what happens in your relationship and isn’t just out for a spring-break type of fling.

Q: Maybe an older man would be better for you?
When I was younger, I thought it was grotesquely comical for all of these older guys to be hitting on me. I thought, why are they hitting on all of my friends, too? Gosh, can’t they go out with women their own age? Now, I don’t think you should judge others or cast the first stone when it comes to relationships. Who needs some goofball on the outside looking in saying, “Oh, look at her life, she’s dating a younger man.”

Q: So don’t judge?
I think it’s inappropriate to judge other people’s happy relationships. If the people aren’t doing any harm, it’s even unacceptable to judge them.

Q: But why do women get frowned upon for dating younger guys when men can date young babes without many repercussions?
Society gets all disturbed about it, thinking that maybe the woman is going out with the younger man just for sex. And that bothers us. But it wouldn’t if it were a man. I guess that’s a burden we put on our genders. Personally, I think it’s definitely good to just shake it all up.

Q: You’ve also gone through a hard divorce recently. How did you cope?
I’ve come to realise that I’m not expected to be the same person again as I was before this happened.

Q: Any advice for women or men going through hard time?
I really have no idea. I don’t know yet what to say. I’m still wondering about a lot of things.

Q: What qualities do you find attractive in a guy?
I love a man who is not too vain. If a man gets all pose-y in front of the mirror, well… Believe me, some of the young actors are vainer than the women. You see them looking at themselves three times in mirror in the same t-shirt going, “Hmmm, I wonder what this t-shirt looks like on me from this angle. In fact, let’s wash and press it again and it will hang better on my shoulder blades.”

Q: What have you figured out about men?
I’m one who adores many in that species and has studied that species carefully. I know their habits, likes and dislikes. But what do I know? Probably not that much!

Cindy Pearlman is an entertainment journalist and co-author of Love Notes: 101 Lessons From The Heart.