However, though the terms “lesbian”, “gay” and “homosexual” are affirmative words used by the community

	There’s a D-word used to describe lesbians.

and heterosexual men and women, there are numerous derogatory words that have emerged over the years.

Queer leer: What’s not acceptable?
There’s a D-word used to describe lesbians. You know the one; it rhymes with “bike,” as in “No, all lesbians do not ride motorbikes” and remains one of the most negative words used to insult women in the gay community. The well-known word mostly used to refer to gay men rhymes with “hag.” (Ironically when paired with its rhyme-sake, “hag” is also the word used within the community to point out girl friends of gay guys.)

The community has assumed the use of both expressions, diminishing their power by making a joke of them. But outside of the community, no matter the manner of delivery or inflection of the person’s voice, the words remain offensive.

“Queen,” “Nancy boy,” “poof” and “fairy” refer to effeminate gay men and generally tend to be used in a deprecating fashion.

Gay okay: What words are acceptable?
Although “queer” originally referred to something that was astonishing, unusual, curious or confusing, the gay political activism of the 1980′s redefined “queer” as an empowering

“Homophobia” is usually born out of an irrational fear of gay people and homosexuality.

moniker—recalling chants of “We’re here. We’re queer. Get used to it.”

There remain many gays and lesbians who are offended by the use of this word outside of the community, but for the most part, it is accepted, and acts as an umbrella term for the LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender) community.

“Gender blender” is an expression often used to describe a lesbian or gay man who dresses in a combination of traditional masculine and feminine attire. “Drag queen,” “transvestite” and “cross-dresser” are the generally acknowledged terms used in both gay and straight circles to refer to a man who dresses and acts like a woman.

It goes both ways
Gays and lesbians have developed their own words to refer to the straight community, but more often than not these are used in a humorous, rather than disparaging, manner. The two most common are “breeders” (especially used for those who glorify childbearing at the expense of the gay community) and “heterosexists” (those straight men and women who consider heterosexuality superior to homosexuality).

The term “homophobe,” coined by George Weinberg in the early ’70s, refers to a heterosexual male or female who openly ridicule and detests homosexual men and women. “Homophobia” is usually born out of an irrational fear of gay people and homosexuality. The word continues to be used freely by both the straight and gay community.

Jerome Kerr is a freelance writer who frequently contributes to Happen magazine.