To read the entire series of articles from the beginning, click here.
n our last episode, our writer was in a quandary—feeling burnt out on dating…but wanting to get out there and meet someone. Find out what she does next…
Monday, 12:05 p.m.
I have a thing for guys in uniforms. It almost doesn’t matter who’s wearing it—it can be a cop, a firefighter, a security guard, whatever. Just give me someone with a badge, and I tend to be interested (unless it’s the various Village People Kevin recently posted online). My problem is that the guys I’m attracted to aren’t usually as intellectual as I’d like, at least not for a long-term relationship.
So when I find this profile, I can feel the adrenaline rush to my fingertips. Chris served in the Marines. Right away I’m a little woozy. Then he describes himself
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| I’m not sure why I’m attracted to burly guys. |
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as a New York Times crossword enthusiast who never shies away from Friday’s puzzle. (For the uninitiated, Friday and Saturday puzzles are the hardest.) Favorite activities are galleries and museums. Reads Emerson and worships Thoreau. Smart. Romantic, too. Says his definition of bliss is waking up every morning with someone he adores. That’s a good sign. He’s thinking long-term.
Physically, he’s just my type: burly, dark-haired, great smile. I’m not sure why I’m attracted to burly guys. My father wasn’t burly. My first love wasn’t burly. But sometime in 9th grade I developed a preference for stocky boys starting with a kid I named FBC, for Fat But Cute. Every Saturday afternoon I’d take a bus to the bowling alley just to sit and watch him bowl. Looking back, I can’t believe I would give up my Saturday afternoons to do nothing but sit like a vegetable watching a boy have fun and, by the way, completely ignore me. If my daughter told me she was spending large chunks of time passively hoping to grab some boy’s attention, I’d encourage her to find better ways to use her spare time. Like cleaning her room.
Monday, 12:10 p.m.
I blast off an email. I tell Chris that I think Will Shortz (the New York Times crossword puzzle editor) is a god. I mention that I named my first bicycle Ralph, after Ralph Waldo Emerson. I attach a recent picture of me in front of the Art Institute of Chicago. Throw in a bunch of random facts about myself and hit the send button. Fingers crossed.
Monday, 12:20 p.m.
I tell myself it’s ridiculous to expect a response 10 minutes after sending my message to Chris but I can’t help myself. I am both deluded and compulsive and can’t help myself. I hit refresh. OMG. He wrote back!
“You sound great and you look beautiful. When were you in Chicago?”
My heart is doing little flip-flops. I want to write back but something inside me is screaming: Play
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| I will myself to walk away from the computer. |
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it cool, Sara. Don’t sound too eager.
I will myself to walk away from the computer. (I am willing to admit at this point that I probably haven’t progressed much since I was in 9th grade and willing to waste my time on a boy.)
Monday, 3 p.m.
OK. I think I’ve waited long enough. I write back: “I was in Chicago last summer on business and managed to find a couple of hours to go to the museum. Their Alfred Stieglitz is one of my favorites. Have you seen it?”
Monday, 8:15 p.m.
The whole day has gone by and I still haven’t heard from Chris. I decide not to take it personally. That’s my latest self-improvement project, by the way: not taking things personally. My therapist has made me promise that every time I find myself assuming the worst, I will say to myself: STOP THAT, SARA! It seems like a rather primitive approach to a behavior as ingrained as my own DNA, but I figure it’s worth a try.
Monday, 10:50 p.m.
No email from Chris. I hope he doesn’t think I’m a big dork, rambling on and on about the Chicago Institute of Art.
STOP THAT, SARA!
OK. I will. At least I’ll try.
Tuesday, 9 a.m.
Finally. A response. Chris writes, “Yeah, I’m a big Stieglitz fan. But I really like their Georgia O’Keefe. That probably sounds girly. I guess I’m in touch with my feminine side. LOL. So, Sara, what else do you like to do for fun? And how do you feel about sushi?”
